Mario and the Flying Castle
by MobileSuitSonic
Summary: On a routine save-Princess-Peach-from-Bowser mission, another enemy shows up. Here's the catch: he's an old enemy to Mario, but a new one for everyone else.


_Toad Town: the capital of the Mushroom Kingdom!_

 _A hometown like your hometown, that is if your hometown were populated by a bunch of diaper-wearing mushroom people._

 _It's home to the world's fifth-largest lava lamp, the annual club sandwich festival, and stately Mushroom Castle, home of Prin—!_

Um, who are you?

 _Oh, um, I'm the narrator._

Dude, this is a fan fic. It's not really an auditory medium. We won't need voiceovers.

 _Please let me stay! I love Mario games!_

So do I, but I don't see the point.

 _Please!_

No.

 _Please!_

No!

 _Please! My show was cancelled last December and I've been going crazy trying to find work! I've got a car I need to pay off and a student loan hanging over my head! It doesn't help that I all I get is rejection e-mails and my unemployment will run out in three weeks!_

…Well I was in the same boat as you once. Okay, you can narrate. But your stuff will be in italics.

 _Oh, thank you! Thank you!_

Let go! You're choking me.

 _Sorry._

Now where are we?

 _I was going to introduce the Mario Bros. in a moment._

Oh, right.

Just a quick pipe trip away from the town square is the home of Mario and Luigi: plumbers by trade, heroes by nature.

The morning was uneventful and Mario had slept in.

Still clad in his red pajamas, the stocky plumber entered the kitchen with a yawn.

Luigi, the younger (though taller) twin, sat at the kitchen table with his eyes fixed on his Game Boy. "Morning, bro," he said quickly, just giving Mario a split second of attention.

Mario poured some coffee into a mug. "So—?"

"NO! Ugh!"

Luigi's outburst made his brother snap alert. "W-What happened?"

"I had a Sleep Powder with Raikou's name on it," Luigi complained "and he ran away as soon as I gave the command!"

Mario sighed in relief. _It's just that dumb game,_ he thought. The phone began to ring. Asking Luigi to get it would be a no-go, so Mario had to pick it up. "Mushroom Plumbing Company! Plumbing's our middle name!" His eyebrows knitted as the call progressed. "When? Okay, Toadsworth, we'll be there in a minute!" He hung up and stormed back to their bedroom. "Weegie, save and quit. Bowser's at it again."

Luigi only replied with "Mm-hmm", still focused on catching that Pokémon.

Mario dashed back in, now in his standard attire, and darted for the door. He turned to see that his green-clad twin was still being the Ahab to Raikou's Moby Dick. "Luigi!"

Luigi bounced when his name was called and immediately turned off his game. "Right, right! Sorry! I'm coming!"

Kastle Koopa is the home of King Bowser of the Koopa Kingdom. He has had several of such castles bearing the name, they often destroyed after a botched kidnapping or some other scheme. The current one is on top of a crag that overlooks a large lake of lava. The main entrance is a large sculpture of Bowser's head, carved out of the rock and its mandible opens and closes.

 _So, it's a_ _jawbridge_ _?_

Cute. Let's see what he's up to.

Bowser stood on the roof of one of the towers, watching as several minions began setting the large table put there. He had a clipboard in hand and called out each box as he went along: "Un-Sloppy Joes, check! Honey jalapeno chicken wings, check! Roast beast, check!"

A green-shelled Koopa Paratroopa wafted up to the monster. "Here's the pickle juice. Vintage 1906."

"Perfect, Jesse!" Bowser chuckled. "Get a bucket of ice for it."

A Goomba approached his boss from the floor-level hatch, balancing a tray of Godzilla rolls on his head. "Uh, forgive me for asking, boss, but isn't this a tad overkill?"

"Please!" the Koopa king said with confidence. "It's candle lit dinner at sundown under an open sky! Girls love that kinda stuff."

"Yeah, well, for the record you know that every time you kidnap the princess Mario shows up?" the Goomba reminded him as he put the tray on the table.

"Oh, don't worry," Bowser told him "When I had this castle built I made sure NOT to put in a back door!"

"What about rain?"

"Already checked the weather, we're good." Bowser was certain about this. Aside from a tiny white speck in the far distance, the sky was as clear as purified water.

A little while passed and Princess Peach was brought up to the roof. She barely touched her plate, as her focus was given to Bowser sloppily scarfing down the smorgasbord he'd laid out for them.

 _I don't think another date is going to be in the cards._

The monster looked at his captive, his face covered in fried rice and pork, and grinned, sheepishly; meat was clearly stuck between his teeth. "So, uh, how do you like the new castle? I was a bit on a fence as whether to install Roto-discs or Firebars in Room #1."

Peach clearly didn't want to be there, but she tried to show some manners. "I think it's… pretty nice."

"I personally like Room #7: filled with water PLUS moving sections of the floor and ceiling!"

"Uh…"

"But enough about that, Peachy, what's new on your end? How's the Koopasta salad?"

Peach twiddled her fingers, trying to think. Nothing big had happened aside from this latest kidnapping. "Well…"

Suddenly, Mario and Luigi busted out of the hatch and interrupted the "romantic" outing.

 _Well that saves her from answering._

Yeah, she seems to be happy about her date-crashers. Bowser, not so much.

The Koopa king growled and got up from the table. "How did you little runts get here?"

"Let's see," Mario started counting each point on his fingers "the front door was left open, we figured out the correct path through that looping section, got past a bunch of statues that shot lasers and fireballs, then there was that Tap-Tap the size of a house—!"

"Look," the monster sighed "I know you plumbers just LOVE to ruin every blind date I have with Peach, but could you AT LEAST let us finish eating?"

"Mama mia!" cried Luigi "Look at that!"

Bowser crossed his arms. "Oh no! I wasn't born yesterday, Beanpole. I ain't letting you or your brother bounce on my head when my back's turned!"

"No, Bowser, look!" said Mario.

"Oh, I'm probably wrong. You want to SPIN-JUMP on my head!" said the annoyed monster. "No, I take it back: you'll toss a fireball at me when I'm not looking!"

"We aren't trying to trick you, there's something in the sky!" said Peach.

"Don't do me like that," Bowser whined. He noticed that right behind the plumbers, the Goomba assigned as a waiter for the meal was just standing there, mouth agape. "Greg, what are you doing just standing there? I told you to get an iced Koopa Tea for the princess!"

"Uh, Lord Bowser?" said the Goomba "There's a castle on a cloud over your right shoulder."

"Fine, I'll look," he surrendered. "But no funny business!"

No lies had been told. A large castle stood on top of a cloud just big enough to support it. It appears to be a blend of Russian, Arabian, and Indian architecture, with white walls and gaudy onion and helmet domes.

"Where did that come from?" Bowser said in shock.

 _Let me guess, that's the little white speck from earlier?_

Yep.

 _Thought so._

Soon, something left the new castle out of a large opening on the tallest tower. It was long and flat and somebody was riding it.


End file.
